The Fuck Yes! Philosophy

by Bobby Rock

Exploring the wisdom of the emphatic. whole-body YES!

Here’s a concept I’ve heard entrepreneur/author Derek Sivers talk about that we would all do well to embrace. When considering a new opportunity or activity that will be occupying future space on our already jammed-up calendars, our decision shouldn’t be a matter of simply yes or no.  It should be a “Fuck Yes!” or “no." If it’s “no,” fair enough. You’ve saved yourself a lot of potential agony in the future regretting why you ever said yes! But if it’s yes, it should be an undeniable “Fuck Yes,” as opposed to the lukewarm “yes" that many of us talk ourselves into because something looks good on paper at first glance.



Here’s why:

It’s About Time: Time is among our most valuable commodities. Everything we say “yes" to invariably takes way more time than we anticipated. So if you’re gonna be adding something, make it a “Fuck Yes!” addition that will bring you joy… or say “No” so that you’ll have the extra space available later to say “Fuck Yes!” when the joyous option inevitably presents itself.

Experience vs. Execution: When we’re younger, “yes” is one of our most important words because getting better at things requires experience, and experience requires the investment of time… which means we have to say “yes” to almost anything that gives us experience. (Every pro musician will reflect fondly on this idea!)  But as we get older, “no” becomes one of our most important words because, now that we’ve paid the piper for all of this valuable experience, we’re also dealing with a more finite amount of time, so we must be more selective about how we spend it… as in, what we say “yes" to. Therefore, I say, every “yes“ must be unequivocal.

Variations and Exceptions: A few things to consider along the way…

A) Sometimes we make gut decisions about things that don’t necessarily bring us a lot of foot-stomping joy, but they are the right thing to do, so we do them. This is part of life… and yet another reason not to waste valuable time giving a tentative "yes" to some bullshit.

B) Other times, we are reinventing ourselves—or expanding our talents and abilities—so we may need more experience, which means saying “yes” to opportunities solely for that reason. This is fine… so long as this reinvention or expansion is a “Fuck Yes!” 

C) Still other times, we may give a weary yes to an activity that we’re not crazy about, BUT—the net effect of our doing so results in a “Fuck Yes!” (Ex: Going to the gym or opting for the healthier meal won’t always inspire a “Fuck Yes,” but the short and long-term results will!). 

D) And, of course, sometimes we agree to things that will give a friend, loved one, or family member a “Fuck Yes!” BUT, we have to manage and prioritize wisely, lest we burn ourselves out.

And Finally...

Getting feedback about new opportunities from those in your inner circle is fine. But remember, everyone tends to bring their own biased filters to every such conversation and, therefore, everyone will have their own idea about what constitutes a “Fuck Yes!” according to them. In the end, only you will know if something is truly a “Fuck Yes!” for you.

Choose accordingly.

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